To be fair, she was replying to a typical French racist half-wit. I can’t reproduce the relevant comments since they have apparently been deleted, but she basically missed an easy opportunity to be soft spoken and therefore more French "Gaulois" appealing - as opposed to the racist moron. The content of her answer to my critic – of which she completely missed the point – on Ibn Kafka’s blog is still there though. It is somehow representative of what I’m talking about.

My comment related to her was (translating from French):

A short constructive criticism, if I may, about the form of your speech. If you want to convey a message, do it on a more neutral, detached, tone. What may be a passionate or a fighter tone in your case, will rather be received as aggressive and hysterical and will harm the content of your message. Whereas among the receivers there are people with whom trying to communicate is a complete waste of time, there are others, more floating opinions, who you might bring to your side. (…)

[further to Ibn Kafka] I am not against any tone, provided it’s used knowingly. In this case, one of the problems that harms French Woggery the most – I am not talking specifically about La Voilée – is the tone that (…) comes through as whiney, hysterical, scummy, petty bully, etc. If this is the goal among those in that population who evoke it, then good for them, they reached it. (…)

My criticism – humble and without sarcasm – and its tone are actually an indication as to how much I believe in what La Voilée is doing (my strictly personal anti-veil opinion aside) and I hope she’s able to listen.

Extracts from her answer, in a strange mixture of overly formal French (typical of working class French Arabs trying to express themselves in an “educated way”) and aggressive pace and content:

I don’t know if you’ve read my posts (a priori no…). (…) I am not hysterical, even though there are reasons to be so. I’m not trying to convince people of accepting my hijab as a religious precept. I’m only trying to describe how a social phenomenon (in this case, the hijab) is perceived [metaphysical paragraph about the meaning of sociology] (…)

I’ll stop here on this point. I think I’ve been clear. I’m not here to justify myself. I don’t want to quibble about it. If you’re in good faith, reading my writing will be enough because it shows, in a very explicit manner, what I just explained.

Otherwise, I do not allow you to speak of “French Woggery”. It’s extremely scornful and of an incredible vulgarity. Provocation is replaced by stupidity. Besides, if I may, what harms the most whom you arrogantly call “French Woggery” (which, as an aside, disgusts me deeply) is exclusion, stereotyping [rant] (…)

Thank you for believing I’m “able to listen”, despite my tendency to hysteria, whining, agressivity, etc. Your trust honors me. Really.

And rest assured, I could note, without much difficulty, your modesty. But don’t overdo it, it’ll kill you.

I gave up there. This exchange isn’t the theme of this entry though. It’s only a case in point of a very recurring “shoot myself in the foot” attitude among French Arabs.

While fishmonger slang is forgiven and one can become a media darling or even a minister when being a Muslim Reformist Hero of Fadela Amara’s kind, other French Arabs start with a serious image handicap that would normally impose an extra-care in public speaking. Even more so in the case of Arab men or veiled women, both incarnating the violent, delinquent, suppressing, irrational fanaticism in French mainstream subconscious.

I don’t know the actual motives behind each individual French Arab who chose to appear on TV, speak on a radio, write a column, create a blog... But I would assume that for most, there’s partly the chance to defend a point of view. More often than not though, they’re a waste of the media opportunities we get. The personal insecurities of those people come out way too easily, and while they claim to fight against discrimination, the stereotyping and such, they’re actually reinforcing them.

Packaging is as important as the content. An audience will be receptive to a message if it identifies with the packaging. The thicker the accent, the more foreign or working class the body language, the more insecure the tone, the bigger distance is put with the French “Gaulois” audience. No matter the legitimacy of the content, a bad form will not buy sympathy.

For whatever reason, I often fail to explain this simple concept to many of my fellow French Arabs. The accusation, like in the above, of arrogance that comes in return to such comments is far from being new to me (“French Woggery” or not). I’m willing to reconsider my own attitude, but my impression is the problem goes beyond: criticism simply leads to an accusation of arrogance, period.

Solving this might be the Holy Grail to fixing many major issues for French Arabs. If you have an idea on how, let me know.